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Warning! Not for the easily offended!

After a run in with Paris Hilton’s lawyers, Gallery of the Absurd removed a piece of artwork from it’s internet blog that showed Paris in an unflattering light. The offending image was this – a parody of Hilton and Ritchie go to camp – now sans fresh-water crabs the Gallery had drawn attached to the side of the boat, in reference to Paris’ alleged (wink) crotch infestation of crabs that many were talking about on the net and which Hilton’s lawyers were not very happy about. So the Gallery removed the offending crabs.

Hilton’s displayed crotch in a host of celebrity mags is more of an assault on womanhood, I think, than a couple of crabs painted on the side of the boat, but more on that later. The fact is, thanks to the papparazi that Paris courts so assiduously, most of us have seen Paris’ crotch, however her crabs have yet to be photographed.
The Simpletons -Gallery of the Absurd
The Gallery removed the crabs from the image but not before vowing to continue painting Paris. Upholding the Gallery’s promise, more images are now ready to be viewed here.

Also from the Gallery is this poignant image of Paris

Paris Hilton - Jason Maynard

According to the artist, the piece speaks “of the pinnacle of modern day mob mentality’s ability to build higher and higher pedestals for their celebrity objects to sit – for the pleasure of seeing them fall.”

I think someone ought to remind the artist Maynard that nobody democratically elected Hilton to be humanity’s “celebrity object.” The same people that hoisted her exposed crotch into the celebrity magazines are the same ones that are scrutinising every detail of her fall from grace, the fall which they themselves have engineered. It’s the media that photograph Paris’ crotch, publish it and put it in the magazines much to our disgust and/or fascination. Men might display their genitals to shock women in lonely public places but for women, there is no power in flashing only shame and scorn lie there. Hilton and co. do not gain any points from it. As we have seen. Or is there?

Call me a cynic but there’s been a flurry of coochie exposing by the rich and famous of late, Britney, Janice Dickenson etc. If a man flashes the response is “ewww, put it away you perv!” but when female celebs are doing it? Outrage. It is the ultimate publicity gimmick. One after another, celebs are leaving their knickers at home and flashing for the papparazzi. One thing that unites all these lunch-box images is that all of them display crotches that have been brazilian waxed, not a hair in sight, making them appear pre-pubescent. Also the labia you would expect to see on a mature woman are absent. Susie Bright writes about it here.

I am left with the grim thought that all these crotch shots are nothing more than an attempt to imprint on women the idealised labia that can only be surgically applied and by plastic surgeorns – it’s all the rage now in the USA.

Here we are trying to tell our teenage daughters that they are beautiful just as they are and the plastic surgeons are selling them silicon here and a nip tuck there. A few years down the line our girls will be demanding labia ops because theirs just doesn’t look right when compared to those pics of Paris and Janice and the girls in the Playboy magazine. And… here are all the politically correct screaming about how the uncivilized perform cliteroctemies!

I don’t blame the parents, the media, or the mob. No, I blame them and the surgeons!

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